Detonation
by Skylark Starflower
Summary: BURN-E and VN-GO weren't EXACTLY doing anything wrong... but everything exploded around them. For eve94's contest.


Author's Note/Disclaimer: I don't own WALL-E, it belongs to Pixar/Disney. However, Vi, Uno, Deux and San are of my own creation. …meh, use 'em if you wanna, just let me know where to look when you're done with 'em?

So, this took me a while to write, what with all the wrong turns it took. It breaks my continuity a little, jumping forward past the next few fics I had planned, so there are going to be some things going on that haven't yet been explained for anyone who's been following. Just trust me; it'll all make sense in time. Also, my ending was a complete travesty, so my ghost writer pretty much re-wrote the whole thing for me. It'll probably be obvious where the tone changes, but I still have to say a great big thanks to Nick Contra for fixing it for me. What was originally there was truly terrible. Once again, for those of you who are just joining me, robot code is in italics, anything in English is in quotes. This is for eve94's anniversary contest.

"**Detonation"  
****By Skylark Starflower  
****Started July 5, 2009  
****Finished July 22, 2009**

The Axiom was quiet but for a lone robot wheeling his way through the halls. BURN-E wasn't looking for anything in particular; he was just on his way back to work after stopping off for some routine maintenance. Humming Berlioz's Rakoczy March, the cheerful welder-bot was passing a tightly sealed storage room, when he paused to examine it.

By this point, almost a year after making landfall, most of the storage rooms on the ship had been thoroughly ransacked. It was strange to find one that was completely untouched, and it made him curious to find out what was inside.

Hopping off his track, he approached the door and studied it. It didn't take him long to learn the room had been closed since before the Axiom was launched. Having been vacuum sealed, it was possible that whatever was inside would still be functional despite the seven hundred years of storage.

"Hmm…" BURN-E searched for the switch to open the door, intent on opening it. Finding it, he first read the serial number for the items stored within, marked next to the switch, but he had no data in his memory banks of these particular items. He would just have to open the door to find out what they could be.

His gripping claw was only inches away from the button when another robot came down the hall, startling him.

_Hey, dude! What are you getting into?_

VN-GO was carrying a small portable charger in his roller. Vi still refused to return to the Axiom, even after all this time, so he had been forced to find an alternate way to have her batteries recharged. The charger he had found with McCrea's help worked well, until it broke down, and now the paint bot was on his way to the Repair Ward to have it fixed.

It wasn't the first time BURN-E and VN-GO had met, and the two got along fairly well, though BURN-E had never met Vi. After losing her sight completely, the black PR-T unit rarely left the studio, and the only time the welder had ever gone by, Vi had been off visiting with WALL-E and EVE. Whenever BURN-E and VN-GO got together, however, they tended to get into mischief, even if they didn't intend to.

BURN-E pulled his claw back as though he had been caught doing something naughty. _Nothing._

_Dude, I'm not getting you in trouble! What's in that room, anyway?_

The welder bot shrugged. _I don't know. I was just about to check._

VN-GO set the charger down next to the door and immediately forgot about it in his excitement. _Open it, man! Let's see what's in there!_

BURN-E shook his head in amusement and turned back to the button, VN-GO hanging his head over the maintenance bot's shoulder. He pushed the button and the door swished open with an intake of air as oxygen rushed into the room for the first time in centuries. The two bots didn't know what to expect on the other side, but what they found wasn't really it.

_Aw, man! Boxes? Borrring!_ VN-GO smeared a box with red paint in disgust. _I thought there would be something COOL in here._

BURN-E flicked his torch in annoyance with the paint bot's impatience. The brief tongue of fire drew VN-GO's attention and he gave the flame throwing welder a look.

_There's probably stuff IN the boxes, you malfunction._ To emphasize his statement, BURN-E turned and tapped on one of the boxes – knocking it from its shelf. It burst open when it hit the floor, its contents spilling across the shiny tiles.

The two robots stared at the items on the ground, VN-GO cocking his head. _What is it?_

BURN-E didn't have an answer for him. Neither bot had seen anything like it before. In fact, no person or robot on Earth or the Axiom has seen anything like it for over six hundred years. WALL-E had once come across something of a similar nature, many years ago while toiling endlessly to clean the Earth. After scaring himself silly with the resulting mayhem caused by his discovery of how they worked, he had never gone near them again.

VN-GO nudged one of the more tubular shaped items, and watched it roll away. _They kind of look like candles… HEY! I know! Light one and let's see what happens!_

BURN-E had the strange feeling that that would be a bad idea. VN-GO's enthusiasm was catching, but not enough to override his caution. _I don't know about this…_

_Oh, come on, dude! What's the worst that could happen?_

BURN-E shuddered at the images that went racing through his processor at that statement. He'd melt himself and VN-GO. The two of them could burn down the Axiom. The Earth could explode into dust. The worst by far, however, was the scolding he was sure to receive from SUPPLY-R, the supply bot who was like an older brother to the often times naïve and far too trusting welder.

BURN-E searched the pile, picking up a small string with several little red tubes attached to it. It seemed like the smallest item from the box, and therefore the least likely to cause any real damage. However, he still couldn't bring himself to light it. He looked to VN-GO, slightly unnerved.

_Are you sure I should do this? We could get into trouble!_

VN-GO made a digital sound that was a bit like a snort. _Bah! I'm not afraid of old taser-happy wheel head! He can't even leave the bridge, what's he going to do to us?_

_I don't mean Auto! What about SUPPLY-R?_

VN-GO laughed. He laughed so hard he had to lean his head against the wall to keep it from falling to the floor. _Would you just light it? Sheesh, you're such a 'fraidy-bot!_

_I am not! _BURN-E scowled at the paint bot and flicked his torch again. However, he had been dangling the collection of red tubes a little too close to it without realising, and the string began to burn.

BURN-E dropped the firecrackers in shock as they began to go off in his hand and backed away quickly. For all his bravado, VN-GO retreated with a frightened squawk, terrified of the loud bangs, cracks and bursts of light. The sound, which was normally loud to begin with, was amplified by the small room.

The sparks being sent off by the string of firecrackers was enough to set off several of the other fireworks that had fallen to the floor, and within moments, the small storage room was host to a mini BnL Day celebration. The two robots were still too terrified by the close proximity of the explosions to be impressed by the colours, both backed up against opposite walls, trying to avoid being exploded.

Other boxes had begun to burn when the smoke finally set off the fire detector. A loud siren, accompanied by a raucous bell, began to wail clear across the Axiom, and the sprinkler system activated. However, the sensor it used to tell where the fire was had been damaged by the fireworks, so instead of only activating where needed, it went off across the whole ship.

Within seconds, the fires were out, and BURN-E and VN-GO were left staring at each other in shock, covered in scorch marks and sopping wet.

X X X

The commotion did not go unnoticed on the bridge. Auto turned angrily towards a screen flashing an alert as the sirens continued to wail and water rained down. Quickly pressing a button, he brought up the information about the alarm. Processing it in seconds, and thanks to a link to the security cameras to tell him the fire was out, he quickly shut off the alarms and deactivated the sprinkler.

Save for the steady dripping of water, silence reigned for several moments as the autopilot seethed. He knew exactly where the trouble was and how it had been caused.

_GO-4!_

The little red and white bot came forward, snapping off a smart salute. Then he got a good look at Auto and couldn't help laughing. Something about the way the autopilot held himself in irritation while water ran from his form amused the little bot greatly. Auto didn't find it very funny, and his tone when he spoke next was sour.

_GO-4, I require you to go to storage room 0041-K and bring me the BURN-E and VN-GO units who are responsible for this mess. You know which ones._

GO-4 had a hard time replying through his mirth. _Yes, sir!_ With that, he left the bridge and its livid Captain, heading for the lower level of the ship.

X X X

_Let me go!_

_No way! If I'm getting in trouble for this, you're coming down with me!_

BURN-E had clamped his claw around one of the metal bars on VN-GO's back and refused to let go. The paint bot wanted to bolt, but the welder wouldn't let him. In desperation, VN-GO turned around and smeared BURN-E with a line of yellow paint.

_Hey!_ But BURN-E still wouldn't let go.

_Come on, man! Getting into trouble's a bummer! Let's just run! They'll never know it was us!_

BURN-E didn't reply, but he had his reasons. He had tried once before to run from the trouble he had caused, and knew from experience that he would just get into more trouble for not owning up right away once he was caught. So it was that GO-4 found the two, BURN-E waiting patiently and VN-GO dejected and motionless, unable to convince the welder to release him.

_You two will come with me._ It wasn't a request. GO-4 waited for them to start moving, but VN-GO continued to resist. No matter how much BURN-E tugged, VN-GO wouldn't budge. In the end, GO-4 was forced to use his red force beam to carry the painter. He was glad BURN-E was coming quietly; his force beam was the same as a SECUR-T's, only less powerful. He could only carry one robot, while a SECUR-T could manage several.

The trip to the bridge was taken in complete silence, save for VN-GO's whining. Being easily distracted, he had completely overlooked his actual purpose on the Axiom, and now felt terrible for forgetting about it. Vi's broken charger was still sitting on the floor next to the storage room.

_Please let me go get it, at least?_ He pleaded, but GO-4 just ignored him. The paint bot went silent once the three reached the bridge. GO-4 deposited his cargo on the floor in front of Auto before going to sit next to the autopilot. BURN-E sat next to VN-GO, and the two dropped their heads in shame under the baleful glare of the Axiom's Captain.

_Would either of you like to inform me as to why you tried to burn down my ship?_

_I'm sorry, sir. It was an accident._ BURN-E's reply was subdued.

_Yeah, we had no idea that would happen!_ VN-GO's was not.

Auto bit back his next response as he considered the ages of the two bots in front of him. For robots, they were fairly young, both having been built long after the Axiom left for space. Neither of them would have known what items were in that storage room, or what they were for. That still did not excuse carelessness, so when Auto spoke again, there was still an angry bite to his tone.

_I understand that neither of you would know what was in that room, but you still should not have been in there in the first place. And to set fire to something unknown is completely irresponsible. I should have the two of you scrapped!_

BURN-E and VN-GO both drew back in shock. They knew they were in trouble, but Auto was being extreme, not to mention that his proposed punishment would be breaking the law. Neither of them really knew Auto, though, or they would have understood that was just the way he was.

_You can't do that! It was only an accident! _protested BURN-E.

_I am aware of that, unfortunately._ While Auto understood the usefulness of the laws, he did miss the days when he could dole out whatever punishment he saw fit. Everyone would be safer without these two rolling disasters on the loose, setting fire to things. _The question remains. What shall I do with you?_

Before anyone could say more, the elevator doors opened to admit someone BURN-E had never actually met before, and someone VN-GO hadn't been able to see for months now. The paint bot hadn't realised how much he missed the man until now.

Bob McCrea was not the same man he had been when the Axiom first made landfall. While only a year ago, he had been overweight, cute like an overlarge baby, he was now trim. His once pudgy baby face was now the face of a handsome man. The work he had been doing demanded a lot from him, and it hadn't taken long for him, and most of the rest of the humans in fact, to lose the weight.

Now, however, there was a look of worry on his face. The alarms had not gone unnoticed in the settlement outside the Axiom.

"Auto, what's going on? What was that alarm about and why is the ship soaked? Is everything okay?"

"The situation is being dealt with, sir," replied Auto, switching to English for the benefit of the human.

"But what happened, Captain? I should have something to tell everyone. They're worried." McCrea hadn't noticed the two extra robots on the bridge until now, and he smiled and shook his head when he recognised his old friend. "I should have known you'd be in trouble again. You attract it like a magnet, VN-GO. How's Vi?"

VN-GO tipped his head, trying to convey that things were okay, considering. He didn't think Auto would appreciate him painting all over the bridge; he was in enough trouble already.

Auto hummed in irritation, bringing McCrea's attention back to him. He grinned sheepishly. "Sorry, Captain. Please continue?" Auto quickly brought McCrea up to speed on the situation, though painting it in a light that made it seem as though the two rule breakers had set off the fireworks on purpose. The mentioning of fireworks confused the man. "What are fireworks?"

"Later, sir. I must do something to punish the guilty parties."

_But we didn't do it on purpose! We weren't trying to burn down the Axiom!_ BURN-E was getting frustrated, but still no one paid him any attention.

"Do you have any ideas?" asked McCrea. He had worked with the autopilot since he had become Captain of the Axiom, and in all that time, he had learned that the robot's idea of punishment was usually harsh and swift. Given the new laws, Auto's punishment options were now severely depleted.

Auto's reply was a chirp of irritation. Everything he would like to do he was no longer allowed to. "I shall think of something."

"Are you sure it was on purpose, Auto? I would think these two bots would be a little reluctant to destroy the ship they, and most of the other robots, depend upon for survival."

Auto did realise that, and had to admit it was probably only an accident, as the two claimed, but it was still difficult for him to wrap his electronic brain around the idea of restraining himself. Things had been a lot simpler in the old days.

"You are correct, sir. I shall… try to be lenient. However, they must know that they cannot do this again. They must learn to be more responsible."

"I agree wholly with that," replied McCrea with a chuckle, glancing pointedly at VN-GO. BURN-E, on the other hand, had never been known to make trouble, but sometimes it did follow him around like a tail.

"Captain?" GO-4 had been silent until now, the little robot sitting patiently by Auto's side. The autopilot glanced down to his second in command.

"Yes?"

"May I make a suggestion? Have them write essays."

While GO-4's suggestion merely had Auto confused, something about it struck McCrea as hilarious, and the man doubled over in laughter. The four robots turned to stare at him until he managed to get control of himself again, waving his hand apologetically. "Sorry, sorry, don't mind me."

"Please explain, GO-4," said Auto.

GO-4 snapped off another salute before doing so. Once, many years ago, the bot had come across a file about schools while doing some research for an earlier Axiom Captain. Reading through it, in case it contained any information about what he was researching, he discovered how essay writing was once used as a form of punishment for children who misbehaved. It was generally looked upon as an annoyance that would encourage students to behave so as not to have one assigned to them.

Auto went silent for a moment, considering the option. He surprised himself by actually being interested in seeing what the two robots would write. It wasn't really his style, but as his style was no longer approved, it would have to do.

"Very well. BURN-E, VN-GO, you are to write me a 3000 word essay explaining why what you did was wrong. I wish to see it in three days' time."

_What?! Dude, that's totally lame! So old school!_ It would take VN-GO forever to write a 3000 word essay, and about as many sheets of paper. BURN-E was just as startled. He had no idea if he would even be able to hold something to write with, let alone print at all.

McCrea, on the other hand, was snickering again. Auto had no idea what he had just set himself up for. The autopilot had never seen VN-GO's writing before, but McCrea had. He hoped he could be on the bridge to see what Auto's reaction would be upon receiving the essays. For now, however, he had something else he wished to ask, but before he could, Auto spoke up once more.

"You may all go now, but do not forget to bring me your essays in three days, or I shall be forced to think of something worse and more… immediate."

The two robots exchanged glances before they turned and bolted from the bridge. They knew better than to cross Auto, even if his taser had been taken away. The autopilot did have a certain level of command to him, and they both understood that if they didn't take their punishment quietly, they could expect much worse.

Once the two were gone, McCrea turned to Auto. "Hey, Auto? Now that that's taken care of, could you tell me what fireworks are?"

X X X

McCrea had an odd look on his face as he left the bridge. Auto had explained about fireworks and their original purpose on the Axiom, and now he had an idea brewing in his head.

Before he went to find the three robots Auto had told him about, who had been specifically built to work with the extremely dangerous explosives, he wanted to check the storage room to see if any of the fireworks were still any good. Apparently too much water could destroy them. Auto had said that he had turned off the water almost immediately after confirming the fire was out, so it was possible they hadn't gotten too wet.

McCrea was in luck. The boxes were a bit damp, but the contents seemed to be dry. Now all he had to do was report back to town and let everyone know everything was okay, and then find the three robots and set his plans into motion.

X X X

"Hee hee hee..."

"Would you shut up? We're trying to talk to the Captain."

"Hee hee hee... BOOM!"

There was a robotic sigh as a third robot shook his head. "You'll have to excuse my brother. Seven hundred years of inactivity and denial of our purpose has made him a little...weird."

"That's okay, but stop calling me Captain. Auto's the Captain now, not me."

McCrea had found the PY-RO brothers shortly after passing on word of the all clear on the Axiom. They resembled BURN-E units, except for modifications including the fact that instead of a track wheel they all had treads for moving over rough terrain. They had been specifically loaded onto the ship for the purpose of celebrating humanity's return to Earth after the five year cruise was up, but as that had never come, the three had stayed in storage. After landfall, all the robots that could be found on the Axiom were reactivated and/or set loose. Laws to govern robots and humans came several months later.

"So, what did you need, sir?"

The three robots were all the same model; the only way to tell them apart was by unit number and the way they talked. They had been given voices so that they could discuss the layout of the display with the human requesting it. McCrea suspected that the Axiom's sister ships had a few PY-RO's of their own, but since the Axiom was the flagship, they had units 001, 002, and 003. For some reason, they now preferred to go by Uno, Deux and San.

"I'd like to know if you would set something up for me." McCrea outlined his idea to the brothers. All three of them listened intently, though Deux continued to giggle like mad. It was clear by the booming and banging noises he continued to make after McCrea was finished that he, at least, was looking forward to the event.

"So, that's in two days, right?" asked Uno.

McCrea nodded. "Yeah, I'm sorry for the short notice, but no one even remembered they were there until a couple other robots found them by accident. I hope it won't be too much trouble?"

"Heck, no!" exclaimed San. "This is what we were made for. We'll get right on it!"

"Mwee hee hee BLAM!"

X X X

McCrea began passing the word around for everyone, human and robot, to gather in the dried out harbour at dusk in two days. He figured it would be the best place to safely set off fireworks, even if he didn't realise how awesome it would be for the acoustics as well. The PY-RO brothers were already hauling boxes from the Axiom and setting up what was still usable. A couple of the boxes had in fact gotten too wet to use.

The two days passed quickly, except for BURN-E and VN-GO, the pair struggling with their essays for Auto. Vi tried to help VN-GO, but he didn't really want to include pseudo-Goth commentary in his work, knowing that it would just irritate the autopilot even more.

BURN-E was right to believe that SUPPLY-R would be upset about his getting into trouble and had gotten yet another lecture upon returning home. It turned out that he wasn't very good at holding a pencil, so his writing was almost as bad as VN-GO's. Neither bot was finished by the time the big night arrived.

X X X

As dusk finally crept over the colony and the bay, Deux was positively frantic in his desire to begin the display.

"Hehehehehe! Burn bang BOOM!" he shouted, charging towards a fuse on the framework.

"There he goes again!" said Uno. "Come on!" He and San darted in front of their brother and shifted him away from the fuse.

X X X

Back at the colony, McCrea was struggling with his speech. "And – uh, I'd like to thank, uh, you all for – oh, crud!" he said, dropping his notes, then turning bright red as he realized he'd said this last directly into the microphone. The settlers laughed and cheered. It was a pleasantly balmy evening, and they were all in a good mood. In the crowd John adjusted Mary's lawn chair carefully, while the five-month pregnant woman insisted she could do it herself. Since John and Mary's romance had blossomed while they were still onboard the Axiom, they had a special reason to slim down even faster than the others: to get close to each other. This they had done, and the first baby to be born since Earth's resettlement was now on its way. The ex-captain finished collecting his notes – and wiped his brow with them.

"Glrshr gurba gunks – oh, no!" he said, as he tried to read the now smeared text. More laughter.

X X X

"Let it begin! LET IT BEGIN! KABLAMMO!" screamed Deux, breaking free of the other two.

"Blast! It's not time! Oh, well. They've all gotta be set off at once," said San, and he and Uno lit their fuses as Deux reached his.

X X X

"Um... er... not possible... something something... heroic actions – ah! This would not be possible without the heroic actions of one little WALL-E unit and the dedication of one special EEEEEEEEEE!" he trailed off as the first explosion detonated way ahead of schedule behind him.

X X X

_It almost seems mean to be keeping those bots from seeing this._ GO-4 commented to Auto as they watched the display from the bridge.

_They transgressed. They paid a price. That is how it must be._ Auto returned stiffly.

_But we'd never have found them if they hadn't –_ started GO-4.

_That is why the essay was only 3000 words._ Auto put in smugly.

"AAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA BOOOM!" came a deranged shriek from outside, just before a Roman Candle shell caromed off the camera of one of the bridge's display hook-ups and exploded. Static followed.

_Captain?_ GO-4 asked tentatively.

_BRING ME –_ Auto shouted, and caught himself. _Bring me that PY-RO unit._

_Yes, sir!_ said GO-4 and streaked off, the punished forgotten in favour of the punishable.

X X X

_Oh, man! How do you spell, er, 'egreejus'?_ VN-GO asked BURN-E.

_How can I answer that? I can't look up a misspelled word to find out how it's spelled!_ BURN-E snapped irritably.

_Harsh, man._ said VN-GO sullenly, turning back to his splattered page. He couldn't concentrate. _This is brutal! I can't believe Auto made us stay in one of the colony buildings to write our essays when he found out about the fireworks. "Punishment should not be entertaining." Guh!_ the paint-bot groused, flipping his page across the room.

There was a sharp clunk from outside the room, which made them both jump – strange, considering the explosive mayhem echoing above.

_What's that?_ said VN-GO curiously.

_Ignore it._ BURN-E said nervously. _Write your essay. You heard what else Auto got from that history text. We're "study partners." If one of us misbehaves, we're both in trouble._

A robotic sob came from outside. VN-GO contemptuously spat paint onto his essay and started for the door.

_Hey! No!_ said BURN-E.

Vi hovered shakily into the room, knocking against the doorframe on the way in. VN-GO drew back in shock. _Vi, what are you doing here? I thought you were going to stay at the studio? _He wasn't surprised by the fact that she had been able to find him. All the robots emitted a unique energy signature, and Vi had simply followed his to find him.

_I wanted to go to the fireworks with you. You could have told me what they looked like. I hate Auto!_ she sobbed, clamping onto one of the bars on his back as she was wont to do when he was leading her about.

_Oh, hey, I, uh..._ VN-GO started, not knowing how to deal with this. _Oh! Hey, BURN-E! You haven't met Vi yet! She's –_ VN-GO trailed off as he saw the astounded way the welder was staring at Vi.

_R-razorwire?_ Said BURN-E, not knowing the reason for the feelings of nostalgia and disbelief that were rising out of his RAM.

_WHAT!?_ _VN-GO, who is BURN-E? WHO'S HERE!?_

X X X

WALL-E and EVE held hands, watching the display.

_This is because of you, you know._ EVE said, leaning carefully into WALL-E's side.

WALL-E leaned over against her side, totally content as the lights burst and span overhead in the night sky.

**The End**


End file.
